Shower sex is one of the best ways to spice things up with your partner whilst also having a break from the routine sexual connection in the bedroom. As steamy and hot as it may sound, you will need to consider a few do’s and don’ts to make this an enjoyable experience for both so that you crave more of it rather than getting injured from a slip or a trip and having an unforgettable, never-want-to-experience-again memory.
The most important thing to avoid during your steamy time in the shower is the wet floor. It is easy to forget about it or ignore it, but the good news is that there is an easy fix. Get grippy mats that stick to the bottom, are easy to clean, and have the potential to absorb or retain water, if possible. Needless to mention, avoid running. Walk and take mini-steps.
Cold temperature can make it difficult to get in the mood, so turning up the heat beforehand can get things started quickly. Reduce the shock of cold air and increase the warmth of a sexual connection that is bound to happen by turning the hot water on beforehand.
Avoid the temptation of going straight to the goal, and instead play with the water, soap, and shampoo by rinsing each other’s bodies. Lathering up parts of the body and rotating the roles keep things juicier and hotter. Play with your partner’s front and back. The most important point to note here is that the attention should be focused on the actual act as minutely as possible. We often tend to get involved in the act rather than staying present and enjoying what is being done. When using soap, rub it slowly, but note that it is going to be slippery.
The more attention you have on what you are doing and where you are doing it, the more you will be able to handle the soap and keep your partner turned on. Make sure the other parts of the body are not left out. Caress and kiss the other non-soapy parts of the body while the soap is being applied.
The person on the receiving end should allow themselves to enjoy this experience or ask for adjustments if need be. Avoid mixing soap and having sex at the same time. The intention of the person applying it should be to find a balance between a playful side and providing nourishment to your partner through love and care.
It might be difficult for her to have enough juiciness down there for you to be able to penetrate without friction, so use waterproof lube. If you spend enough time caressing and kissing her, lube might not be necessary, but often, it will be needed. Having a silicone-based lube is always a win-win.
Make sure the lube is placed in the cupboard in the bathroom as you wouldn’t want to leave and interrupt the scene halfway through. Lube would also help avoid irritation to the vulva, vagina, and penis caused by friction.
Ensure that the focus is not on the goal, but on exploring the body in the explored and unexplored erogenous zones. If this leads to sex, then go for it, but if not, then enjoy finding out the other minute details of your partner’s body responses in this new way. The focus should be on having fun and experiencing pleasure rather than on penetration and orgasm.
Avoid being too adventurous in the first few times because it is better to avoid accidents and become comfortable in this new playground. You can always get to the sexier and more adventurous positions another time. The focus is to have the thrust that feels good, but your bodies should remain balanced to avoid any mishaps. It is very easy to get overwhelmed in the act and lose focus. Getting imbalanced and experiencing an injury is the last thing anyone would want to experience.
The type of position will depend on the size of the bathroom, so use places like inside the bath, the edges of the tub, the shower walls, etc.
A few positions that work well are standing doggy style, the sit, and slide, the wraparound, the wheelbarrow, the chairperson, the face off, etc. The penis can get fractured or bent when trying sexual positions that you are not familiar with, so build it slowly.
You should already know which positions work best for both of you, assuming that you would not be having your first sexual encounter in the shower, so start with the positions that you are more familiar with among the ones listed above.
If you want to keep it safe, then it is better to use a condom as it is always better to be safe than sorry. Being mindful helps to avoid such mishaps not only for oneself but also for the other person. A condom can break easily due to water, so always put the condom on when the penis is not wet. Oil-based lubricants and even chlorine and other additives present in water can cause a condom to break, so be mindful of that. For women, it is advisable to have birth control pills, if possible.
You can use suction-on handles and footrests in showers for extra support and stability, which can make a big difference in the overall experience.
Playing some erotic songs and having candles can also add to the ambiance and the mood depending on the time of the shower sexual play.
These should apply in every sexual act, not just in the shower:
Make sure both parties have full consent in all that is being engaged in at all times. Do not go with an assumption. If in doubt, ask.
This may sound weird, but it won’t be if you practice it and get into the habit of it. During the connection, always be willing to make offers as to what you would like to do, i.e., kiss on her breasts, bite on his lower back, or nibble on his penis. Similarly, if something received doesn’t feel right, you can always ask for an adjustment. E.g., can you bite a bit slower or can you lick me to the left? The more you practice these, the more you will be able to get in tune with each other’s bodies.
We all know how unrealistic pictures are being portrayed in romantic movies whether it be relating to life or having sex in the shower. Avoid fantasizing about those unrealistic experiences, but stay in the present and let every experience develops and unfold itself.
Be aware that shower sex can be fun and also challenging at times, so your experiences are likely to vary each time. Keep your stress levels low. If need be, let your partner know how you are feeling and what is coming up for you. Honest conversations need not happen in the bedroom, they can happen in the bathroom, too. Intimacy can be created anywhere. An honest authentic conversation at the moment when things are coming up can go a long way toward creating deeper intimacy and fulfilling experiences.
Finish off in the shower or take it to the bedroom: Don’t always aim to finish in the shower. Alternate by taking the build up into the bedroom.
Check-in with your partner not only during or immediately afterward, but also during the day. This retains connection and has the other partner feeling cared for.
Communicate what worked and what didn’t, and how things could be improved to create overall amazing and memorable experiences for you both.
Shower sex is an amazing way to create nourishing experiences for each of you. Take things slowly as you would want to avoid any bad experiences in the beginning.
A hot shower generally provides relaxation to the body, and for deeper experiences of orgasms, relaxation and a deep surrender of the mind is very important. Keep a diary as part of self-reflection and come back to it whenever needed.