Learn all about the G-spot, where it is, how to find it, how to orgasm and how to squirt. Find out what may be stopping you and how to overcome it. Learn to squirt!
The G–spot, is a highly sensitive erogenous zone located 2-3 inches inside the vagina can cause sexual arousal, intense pleasure, powerful orgasms, and female ejaculation (or squirting) when properly stimulated.
The G-spot (G Spot or Gräfenberg spot) was discovered by Ernst Gräfenberg a German gynecologist who first described it as “an erotic zone located on the anterior wall of the vagina along the course of the urethra that would swell during sexual stimulation.” It is a part of a larger erogenous structure known as the clitorethrovaginal complex, or CVU, which includes the clitoris, vagina, and urethra. The area the G-spot occupies is called the urethral sponge and it is tissue that surrounds the urethra (the tube we pee out of) that swells with fluid during sexual arousal.
The G-spot is associated with the prostate gland in men and is made up of a complex system of erectile tissue, secretion glands (the Skene’s gland), as well as the internal pelvic nerve and muscles that engage with one another during the arousal cycle.
In most women it is sensitive to pressure and stimulation which can lead to high levels of sexual arousal and powerful orgasms. The existence of a G-spot has been widely accepted and most popular sexology books treat it as fact. In one study of female ejaculation, 84% of the approximately 1300 professional women who responded reported a sensitive area in the vagina, and this was correlated with those who also reported ejaculation.
The G-spot can be found inside the vagina about 2-3 inches deep, in the front or belly-side wall of the vagina. You can find it with your fingers by feeling around the front wall or roof of the vagina, just behind the pelvic bone. There, a wrinkly, prune-like tissue (the urethral sponge) will swell with fluid when aroused via firm, deep pressure, thus making it noticeable to touch. It has remained elusive in the past because in its sexually un-stimulated state, it is relatively small and difficult to locate, especially since it is internal and you can’t see it like the clitoris.
This area is what accounts for g-spot orgasms and squirting. G-spot orgasms can occur with or without female ejaculation.
The best way to find the G-spot is through sexual play and experimentation with your partner or by yourself. When exploring solo make sure to get into a comfortable position on your bed or in a comfy chair, half-sitting with you back curled, your thighs apart, and your knees bent up towards you, so you can easily reach it.
Since the G-spot only reveals itself when women are very turned-on, other forms of sexual stimulation and foreplay are encouraged before-hand. Once you become very aroused, you or your partner may then explore the internal vaginal wall (2-3 inches deep) and find the erectile tissue that will feel bumpy and more swollen than the surrounding smooth tissue.
It is best to use your fingers for exploration at first by inserting 1-2 fingers and curling them in a “come-hither” motion that strokes the G-spot area. If you have long nails it is best to trim them short before exploration to avoid scratching the delicate inner tissues, or wear gloves.
In some women, the G-spot can be as large around as an apricot, but in others it may be as small as a cherry. You’ll know when you hit the G-spot by the distinctive sensation it creates. Stimulating it may give you a rush of pleasure, or make you want to pee.
Every woman’s response to sexual stimulation and sensitivity is different. Sensitivity may also vary at different times of the month. Just like some women enjoy direct stimulation to the clitoris while others do not, the same goes for the G-spot.
The best way to find out how to stimulate it is to explore what feels good to you. To begin with, make sure you are already sexually stimulated by other means. Once you are warmed up, you can begin exploring your G-spot.
You should give yourself lots of time for this exploration and make sure you won’t have any disturbances. So turn off the phone, lock the door and get comfortable. Make sure you have a big absorbent towel under you or a sex blanket to absorb any female ejaculation fluids you may emit during play. It is also a good idea, to empty your bladder before attempting G-spot stimulation, orgasm and female ejaculation.
Technically a G-spot orgasm is any orgasm that is produced from G-spot stimulation. However, orgasms are varied and individual. And, the G-spot is only an extension of the Clitoris or clitorethrovaginal complex, so any orgasm that is genital related could be a G-spot orgasm.
For most women, a G-spot orgasm differs from a clitoral orgasm is that:
A clitoral orgasm is a quick tension release orgasm, like a sneeze. Although pleasurable it is over quickly. A G-spot orgasm is usually longer lasting and much deeper inside the vagina, and can lead to continuous and whole-body orgasms.
A G-spot orgasm can lead to squirting or female ejaculation. However, some women can ejaculate from clitoral or other stimulation as well.
A G-spot orgasm can feel similar to a deep spot or cervical orgasm, as they both take place within the vagina. However, a G-spot orgasm will be closer to the vaginal opening, whereas a cervical orgasm is up towards the back of the vagina. Also, a cervical orgasm involves the vagus nerve, but may not be stimulated during a G-spot orgasm.
Deborah Sundahl, author of “Female Ejaculation and the G-spot” recommends sitting in front of a full length mirror and a flashlight, so you can not only feel, but see your G-spot as well, once it becomes aroused. Here are the steps from her book (edited for clarity) on how to stimulate the G-spot.
It is very common that the first time you try G-spot orgasm that you won’t climax. if you followed the steps above and didn’t experience G-spot orgasm, don’t worry.
There are many reasons why you may have not experienced an orgasm or squirting.
It is your first time and you need more practice in learning what you body likes, to get used to the feel of G-spot arousal which is very different than clitoris stimulation.
You may have expectations that were different from your experience. Be kind to yourself and realize every woman’s G-spot and arousal may be different. You simply need to explore and experiment more to find out what turns YOU on.
You may not be able to get out of your head and into your body and be able to let go. Again this is very common. Practice mindful techniques: breathing, meditation, focusing on your senses instead of your thoughts. There is no right or wrong way to do this, so don’t worry.
If your PC muscles are weak, you may have a hard time ejaculating. Luckily, you can do kegel exercises to strengthen them and there are a lot of great products available that can aid you like Yoni Eggs. You can also use various G-spot sex toys that are designed especially for G-spot stimulation. The strength of a woman’s PC muscles is directly related to her ability to reach orgasm through intercourse; therefore stronger PC muscles will promote stronger G-spot orgasms, and easier arousal of this zone.
Sometimes women will also tense up and try to hold back the feeling that they need to pee. You have to go with the feeling of having to pee and not fight it.Relax and let go.
You may experience numbness, pain, or discomfort. Again, this happens a lot to women. Our G-spot has a cellular memory and can hold on to past trauma, abuse, emotions, and feeling of guilt, shame, unworthiness, and body dysmorphia or negative body issues. You may need to do some body de-armoring first to remove built up tension, pain, and blockages so we can FEEL pleasure again and move the sexual energy through our bodies.
You may not have used enough stimulation. The G-spot enjoys firm, heavy, deep stimulation. So don’t be afraid to push into it to whatever feels good.
You may not have enough stamina. G-spot orgasms are hard work. You can’t just click on your vibrator and rub one off. They take time to build up arousal, lots of foreplay, patience, experimentation, self-awareness and exploration. And, stamina. You need to keep going until you get there. Which is why a G-spot dildo or a wand comes in handy so your hand and wrist don’t get fatigued. Also, having your partner help out and finger you can help a lot as well. Then you can more easily lie back, relax, let get and enjoy. By myself, I can usually only have 1 or 2 G-spot orgasms before I’m totally worn out. With my partner I can go all night long (as long as he can). So, patience is key!
Don’t forget the clitoris. For most of us, the clitoris is our number one erogenous zone, so still requires lots of stimulation to turn on the G-spot. Stimulating the clitoris while exploring G-spot pleasure is not cheating. It just adds to the orgasmic experience. Again, do whatever feels good and gets you there. And, if you find that fingers or a dildo alone is not getting you there, try using your favorite go-to clitoral vibe to increase stimulation of needed. Experiencing clitoral climax with G-spot stimulation will help rewire your brain for G-spot pleasure and orgasm.
You may be too young? For some reason it is easier for mature women to learn how to squirt than it is for younger women. The reason why may vary. It could be self-knowledge of their own body and pleasure. Experience and practice. Ability to not give a shit and just let go. For whatever reason, just because you are young doesn’t mean you won’t get there. Keep exploring and practicing and it will come.
You simply may not enjoy G-spot stimulation and that’s fine too. Some women get off on nipple stimulation and have nipple orgasms, some women don’t. Don’t get caught up in comparsionitis. You body is unique and beautiful just the way it is. You’re NOT broken.
You think you are on of the unfortunate women who CAN’T experience G-spot orgasm or female ejaculation. The truth is, every female-bodied human can experience G-spot orgasm. We all have a G-spot (women), therefore we can all experience orgasm. Just like we all have ears and can experience earaches. However, some of us have chronic ear infections or aches and some of use don’t. So, know you can and that will get you 90% of the way there. Thinking you can’t will block you from the experience.
If you don’t squirt, again don’t worry about it. Squirting takes practice too.Most often this is a mental issue rather than a physical issue. Perhaps you find it hard going over the edge and letting go? Maybe you worry that ejaculate is actually pee, or that it is dirty or messy? Maybe it feels too weird and you stop. You may also not be hydrated enough. Or you may have some physical impediment that is blocking the urethra so the ejaculate can’t be expelled. Porn star, Nina Hartley, who is very experienced when it comes to all kinds of sex, including the G-spot, has admitted that she can’t experience G-spot orgasm or squirting no matter how hard she has tried. This may be due to her urethra being close to her vaginal opening, so when she tries to ejaculate, her urethra becomes blocked and can’t emit fluid. So, there may be physical reasons why “some” women can’t squirt. Unfortunately, no research has been done in this area, so this is only my own speculation and my observation while helping numerous other women learn how to squirt over the years.
Finally, squirting comes easily to some women and not to others. Again, we are all different. I’m not that great at riding a bike, but I can squirt ejaculate across the room. But, if I practiced biking riding I’d probably get a lot better. Same with G-spot arousal. Practice makes perfect. Educate yourself, experiment, explore and practice.
Image by Jill Wellington from Pixabay
To every women G-spot arousal and orgasm will feel different. The experience is unique to you. But here are some observations of what other women have reported in their G-spot journeys.
The G-spot is not a magic button that can be pressed and simply produce mind-blowing orgasms (at least in most women). Some women will feel little or nothing. Others may feel uncomfortable like they have to pee. Many women feel a powerful urge to “bear down”, the same sensation of pushing when delivering a baby. Still, some will experience deep, intense orgasms that are distinctly different to clitoral orgasms altogether.
Stages of arousal will vary from woman to woman and will depend on many factors including:
Image by S. Hermann & F. Richter from Pixabay
Often during stimulation, the G-spot will become increasingly sensitive and many women feel a building euphoria and elevated arousal. Some women will enjoy deep, firm thrusting, while others may want to use clitoral stimulation to enhance the G-spot experience. As this euphoric sensation and the sexual energy of climax continues, you may feel as though you are going to burst. This is the time to let yourself plunge over the edge of sexual ecstasy and experience a G-spot orgasm.
Some G-spot orgasms with feel like a roar of sexual energy that is experienced as a deep, full-body quaking and total sexual release. Others describe it as oceanic, a very liquid sensation, like a dam breaking or a rippling effect that sends waves of pleasure tingling through you. G-spot orgasms can last longer than clitoral orgasms, with longer, deeper contractions and/or multiple contractions. Many women note that a G-spot orgasm comes after a series of smaller orgasms, when they are at the ultimate peak of arousal. Some women experience shooting stars of erotic pleasure sparking through them. To some women, G-spot orgasms are more powerful than any other type they have ever experienced. Some women get dizzy headed, will feel euphoric, like an outer-body experience or altered state of consciousness. Other women will experience G-spot orgasm in full-bodied waves, or throbbing coming from their genitals and radiating throughout thie body. For other women it will be more localized. To some women, they may have a Tantric experience where they feel more connected to the universe or Source consciousness. Their experience may feel spiritual, ecstatic, awakening, surrendering. Some women may cry, scream, feel sad, emotional, laugh uncontrollably, shake, swear, get angry and release pent up emotions.
Not all women will experience female ejaculation (or notice it) with G-spot orgasm and ejaculation may not happen every time. All women have a Skene’s gland however and are capable of ejaculation.
Female ejaculation or squirting (also can gushing) is the expulsion of ejaculate fluid secreted from the paraurethral ducts (or Skene’s gland or female prostate) on either side of the urethra when a woman is sexually aroused. The female prostate is analogous to the male prostate and ejaculation in men. Female ejaculation can happen with or without orgasm. Many women may try to suppress the urge to ejaculate because it feels uncomfortable or because they think it is pee.
Female ejaculate has also been referred to as Amrita, Ambrosia, Nectar of the Gods/Goddess, the Nectar of Aphrodite, the Fountain of Venus and the Champagne of Sex. There are historical records documenting female ejaculation that goes back 2000 years! So is it real? You betcha! Although some of the scientific community is lagging behind in their research in this area and would beg to differ, female ejaculate is real, and it’s not pee.
Image by Thomas Ulrich from Pixabay
“Credible evidence exists among different cultures that the female prostate and female ejaculation have been discovered, described and then forgotten over the last 2,000 years.”—The History of Female Ejaculation–Joanna B Korda, Sue W Goldstein, Frank Sommer
While some current scientists may have problems admitting there is a female G-spot and that women can emit ejaculate fluids, the ancients had numerous texts referring to the G-spot (her inner heart) and female ejaculate (moon flower, milk fruit, love juice, storm of love water…). Skip to the Infographic below if you don’t like to read text!
The classical Taoist text, “Secret Instructions Concerning the Jade Chamber,” (4th century BC) provides the first known evidence of female ejaculation, referring to a “slippery vagina,” (sexual arousal) and “the genitals transmit fluid” (female ejaculate during orgasm), then later warns a woman not to “shake and dance about, causing your
female fluid to be exhausted first”.
Ancient Chinese sex manuals called orgasm “The Bursting of the Clouds”. In the 1976 book, “The Tao of Love and Sex: the Ancient Chinese Way to Ecstasy”, the author translate ancient texts: men must learn how to arouse a woman “so he can benefit from her flooding secretions”, and once she orgasms, “Her vulva is flooding. Her tide of yin has come. The man can see for himself that his woman is happy.”
In “A Popular Exposition of the Methods of Regenerating the Primary Vitalities,” female ejaculation is called “beneficial medicine”: “The lower peak comes from the vagina and is called the peak of the purple agaric (clitoris/and or vagina), the grotto of the white tiger
or the mysterious gateway (vagina). Its medicine is called Black Lead, or Moon Flower (female ejaculate). Located in the vagina, it does not usually flow out except when it is secreted during coitus (orgasm). It is very good for the “original yang” and spirit.”
Another text describes female ejaculation in more depth during intercourse: “Her Jade Gate becomes moist and slippery; then the man should plunge into her very deeply. Finally copious emissions from her Inner Heart begin to exude outward”, and, in a old Chinese prose poem, describes an area called the “milk fruit” which produces whitish “milky” fluid.
Similarly, ancient Indian text make note of female ejaculate, including the poem of the “Amarushataka,” (7th century A.D), which describes her ecstasy and fluid orgasm: “Her breasts were compressed in close embracement, frisson of excitement apprehended her torso, smooth love juice overflowed abundantly the garment, right there where her girdle was located…”
The “Ka¯masu¯ tra” (Aphorisms on Love), also mentions the female ejaculation: “The fall of the semen of the man takes place only at the end of coition, while the semen of the
woman falls continually…” suggesting that the female ejaculate was both continuous and profuse, and the she then becomes “wet like a broken water vessel”…
Yet another ancient poem says the “(vagina/vulva) and is endowed with numerous love water veins” when rubbed by the penis and this “rubbing creates the flow of vaginal fluid
(“ksarana”) followed by the orgasm (“sukha”), and that she who has “emitted the water of the one whose arrow is of flowers at the end of coitus dances with much jumping and crying”.
To bring a woman to a squirting orgasm, another text describes how to massage her G-spot: her “(tube) similar to the male penis located in the middle of the vagina, is agitated with two fingers, a storm of love water is spilled. “The swollen tube [G-spot] should be agitated with the fore and middle finger various times…” and that penetration should not follow until she is very aroused by other means.
The poet Kalyanamalla (16th century A.D.) also described women by their vagina and the female lubricant expelled:
The Padmini (or Lotus-woman), her “Yoni resembles the open lotus-bud, and her
Love-seed (Kama-salila, the water of life) is perfumed like the lily, which has newly burst.”
Chitrini (or Art-woman), has “Kama-salila (love seed or love juice or ejaculate) that is hot and has the perfume of honey, producing from its abundance a sound during the venereal rite.”
For Shankhini (or Conch-woman), her “Yoni is ever moist with Kama-salila, which is distinctly salt, and the cleft is covered with thick hair.”
The Hastini has “Kama-salila that has the savour of the juice, which flows in the spring from the elephant’s temples”.
The “father of medicine,” Hippocrates (460–375 B.C.), in which he identifies a fluid like semen that women emit during sex: “A woman also emits something from her body, sometimes into the womb, which then becomes moist, and sometimes externally as well… If her desire for intercourse is excited, she emits before the man.”
Image by Myriam Zilles from Pixabay
What is female ejaculation fluid made of? Sugar and spice and everything nice of course. But seriously…
Some people in the medical community have denied the fact that both G-spot orgasms and female ejaculations do occur and have mistaken female squirting as urinary incontinence. However, there have been conclusive studies that prove the existence of both the G-spot and female ejaculation.
Female ejaculate is not pee. Analysis of female ejaculate has shown that it is distinct from urine and contains high levels of the enzyme prostatic acid phosphatase (PSA), glucose and fructose (all found in the prostate fluid of semen). Female ejaculate does not look, smell or taste like urine. It has the same consistency as water and is a clear or milky, usually odorless (although sometimes musky) smelling fluid that can be slightly sweet due to the sugar (glucose/fructose) content and alkaline. As with semen, female ejaculate will smell and taste different depending on the person and what you eat.
Image by Kai Vogel from Pixabay
According to some studies, female ejaculate comes in various forms: “Female ejaculation and squirting/gushing are two different phenomena. The organs and the mechanisms that produce them are bona fide different. The real female ejaculation is the release of a very scanty, thick, and whitish fluid from the female prostate, while the squirting is the expulsion of a diluted fluid from the urinary bladder.”–“New Insights From One Case of Female Ejaculation“–Alberto Rubio-Casillas, Emmanuele A Jannini
Another study goes further to break down the components of female ejaculation, and squirting: “Female ejaculation (FE) is the secretion of a few milliliters of thick, milky fluid by the female prostate (Skene’s glands) during orgasm, which contains prostate-specific antigen. Squirting (SQ) is defined as the orgasmic transurethral expulsion of tenths of milliliters of a form of urine containing various concentrations of urea, creatinine, and uric acid. FE and SQ are two phenomena with different mechanisms.”–“Differential Diagnostics of Female “Sexual” Fluids: A Narrative Review“–Zlatko Pastor, Roman Chmel
According to Tantric practitioner Devi Ward and her colleague Marthe Schneider there are four types of female ejaculation or “nectar of the Goddess or Ambrosia”, including 2 types of urethral emission and 2 types of vaginal emission. These include:
Most women cannot ejaculate on command. For many women, G-spot ejaculation the first time is often a fluke and comes as a complete surprise. Some women only experience a few drops to a teaspoon of ejaculate fluid, while others may experience up to two quarts of fluid along with explosive gushes and squirting, sometimes up to several feet.
Sometimes the ejaculation will occur multiple times during orgasm as well. 54-60% (reportedly) of women have experienced emission of fluid at orgasm. Also, some women can ejaculate with clitoral stimulation only or no stimulation what-so-ever. Like sexual preferences, every woman’s response to G-spot stimulation is different.
Learning how to squirt simply takes practice. It also takes an open mind, willingness to surrender to orgasm and pleasure, learning how to push out with your PC muscle, learning how to relax, lots of erotic stimulation and foreplay, becoming very intimate with your female genital anatomy, stamina, good hydration and again practice.
Image by Anja from Pixabay
You’ll know you’ve found your G-spot when you feel the wrinkly prune-like tissue on the top belly-side of your vagina. Again, remember this is 1-3 inches in depending on your personal anatomy. So, feel around for this wrinkly spot.
The spot with feel similar to your tongue rubbing the top if your mouth–ridged, wrinkled, slightly protruding–whereas the skin around the G-spot will feel like the insides of your cheeks, smooth and silky.
Another way to know that you’ve hit the right spot is that it will start to swell with fluid. So, it actually gets bigger as you stimulate it. For some women it can swell up so much that you can see it from the vaginal opening! So, don’t forget to use your mirror to check it out.
Finally, you’ll know you hit the G-spot by the way it feels. It may feel weird, queer, uncomfortable, like you need to pee, itchy, tingly, ticklely, or aroused. Then again, you could feel nothing (it may be numb), or you may feel discomfort or even pain due to the body’s armoring. Use de-armoring techniques to help bring back sensation.
Image by cor gaasbeek from Pixabay
Kind of a strange question, but hey no question is dumb, right?
It really depends on the person, what could happen when you hit the G-spot. If done correctly (in that you have arousing stimulation), you will likely have a G-spot orgasm and maybe even squirting. However, nothing what-so-ever may also happen.
Also, be aware that many pent up emotions can be released during G-spot arousal and orgasm as well. Crying, screaming, sadness, anger, elation, euphoria, dizziness, giggling and laughter, and all of the above simultaneously. Ain’t orgasm a wonderful thing!
Image by klimkin from Pixabay
It is true that some women never experience orgasm. This is a sexual dysfunction called “Anorgasmia”, in which a person cannot achieve orgasm, even with adequate stimulation.
The condition is sometimes classified as a psychiatric disorder, but also may be caused by medical conditions as well.
An estimated 10-15% of women can’t orgasm at all.
Marilyn Monroe, despite being a huge sexual icon, was anorgasmic. The most extreme “cure” for Anorgasmia is the orgasmatron which is an implant inserted into the spinal cord, that is controlled by a remote control and stimulates the user when switched on.
However, many with this condition could be experiencing a lack of libido, desire, or an inability to orgasm die to mental and psychological factors. So, for many women there is help.
Mindful masturbation is an excellent way to learn how to pleasure yourself and achieve orgasm.
Image by 5882641 from Pixabay
Sometimes stimulating the G-spot can lead to negative effects in some women. The G-spot is a highly sensitive area and some women can experience irritation, pain or infection. This can be especially true of virgins or women with tense PC muscles. To avoid infection and irritation women should drink plenty of water before and after G-spot stimulation, especially if prone to urinary tract infections. Also, emptying the bladder before and after is also important. Cranberry juice is also effective in fighting the bacteria that causes infections. Be careful of how much pressure you apply during stimulation and work up to it slowly. Make sure to use only clean toys and clean hands or gloves. Make sure that fingernails are cut short to avoid breaking the skin.
Deborah Sundahl also notes that trauma (emotional and physical) can be stored in various places in the body including the G-spot and cause blockages in energy which is referred to as “body armoring”. This can make G-spot exploration overly sensitive, numbing, or even painful to some women. Sundahl recommends treatment for women who experience pain or emotional trauma during G-spot exploration with a qualified sex “body” worker. Again, please refer to her book: “Female Ejaculation and the G-spot” for more information on this.
So, are you ready to Squirt? Or are you already a squirter?
Let us know in the comments below!
This article was originally published here.