As humans, we put so much effort into planning; we plan the route we will take to the office, plan the clothes we will wear, plan our breakfast, lunch & supper, plan our bath time, and our choice of recreational activity. All this planning is demonstrated as self-care for oneself. Rightfully, self-care is important and does need planning or will never be prioritized.
Intimate relationships take planning too. Planning helps you to thrive and lack of planning can only result in failure. The benefit of planning for your intimate relationship has benefits that will boost your relationship to unimaginable levels. How, you may ask?
An orgasm is when the body experiences a rise in the intensity of sexual arousal, which peaks for a few seconds and then lowers to a normal level. Studies suggest many biological benefits of an orgasm. Including a healthier immune system and reduction of stress. During the peak, the brain releases a cocktail of neurochemicals such as dopamine, oxytocin, and serotonin. These are happy hormones, and the benefits are immense as listed hereunder:
It cannot be stressed upon more the need to have a healthy, sexually fulfilling relationship with the natural benefits oozing through yourself naturally. This is where you take control with your partner, knowing that no one else can make that change except you. You may feel overwhelmed by reading this and wonder where you start.
Just like you plan all other activities, bring sex onto the planning platform. Start small with some of the below-listed ideas and expand. Most importantly, attitude and consistency will make the difference. There is no need to be perfect at it. Having the right intent is what makes the difference.
As humans, if we want something, we go after it. Once we have what we want, complacency sets in and we tend to take each other for granted. We journey into a mode where the relationship is not granted any planning. Instead, just happens as and when there are time and desire.
Have you and your partner discussed how you make each other feel? Perhaps it is a good time to plan a conversation around this.
Both of you may have fantasies about what you like to experience with each other; however, you both hold back and do not talk about it as there never is an opportunity. Let us face it, when you in the middle of lovemaking, one can move their partner gently into a change of position. However, if you would like to experience something more, it does take planning. For example, you cannot pause the sexual activity and whip out the ropes to experience some bondage if this has not been communicated with your partner.
Communication is essential to planning as a guide hereunder:
The above is a healthy way to set boundaries with clear expectations which have been defined because of the discussion. It leaves no grey area and if there is an agreement, with caution, you will set safewords during the discussion to ensure there is no violation during sexual activity. In the intensity of the moment, it is difficult to set boundaries; however, having done so upfront has planted the seed on how far one can go. At all times, it is important to respect boundaries and not be forceful. It can become a gradual journey taken together as comfort levels and trust increases.
It will certainly feel unnatural at the beginning of this process until you and your partner get into the habit of planning and discussing your intimate lives. It will deepen the bond in the relationship and build trust. You will remove the masks and start communicating openly about what you want to experience and explore with each other. Vulnerability will become the new sexy on this adventure together.
Experiment Explore & Learn together!
Life is short. Make it wild, crazy, sexy & exciting for each other.