When we talk about what we want our relationships to be, we have to start where we are. If you are in a relationship, when was the last time you paused to check in with your thoughts about the health of your relationship?
On a day-to-day basis, most people are trying to make the business of life happen, by meeting personal and familial basic needs, meeting work and professional needs and demands, social commitments, etc. Sitting down for serious relationship conversations can end up last on the priority list, especially if there’s some fear of what might come up.
Without regular maintenance and repair, unhealthy patterns can creep into relationships. You might find yourself less connected to your partner slowly over time, or facing a major blow-out which has been building up over time.
This means you’re both interested in working together to create a general idea of the shared goals and visions you’d like to manifest for your relationship, and ideas of how you might achieve these goals together.
Being on the same team means knowing the rules of the game, and practicing the skills needed personally and collectively to bring your best to the game. Practice may not make perfect, but perfect isn’t the goal here.
Getting back in touch with how you felt at the beginning of your relationship can be one entry point. What brought you, folks, together? What were your hopes and dreams for the relationship at that time? How does that compare with where you find yourself now, and where you’d like to go?
When was the last time you checked in with yourself about your level of satisfaction in relationship?
Is your current relationship what you want?
Is your current relationship what you initially agreed to?
What is the state of your trust in relationship?
Scheduling personal daily check-ins can be a helpful way to get in the habit of checking in with yourself and your relationship. At the end of the day, take a few moments to reflect on the following questions:
Relationship check-ins can feel a little daunting, especially if this is a new practice in your relationship. If you’d like support with questions to guide you and your partner, download our free Relationship Check-in playsheet to help you get started.
Originally posted on Wellcelium.org
Cover photo by Pexels
Subscribe to our weekly newsletter and stay updated on our best sexual well-being articles, podcasts, workshops, and more.